I have a TWO year old boy!

Oliver James is now a toddlin' tootin' terribly wonderful TWO year old.

His birthday was last week and we've been having little parties for a couple weeks, his formal birthday party yesterday. I think it's taken all these celebrations, all these moments for me to have the capacity to attempt to collect my thoughts on this milestone in his life.

I have been thinking of Ollie's birth story, the moment he came into my life. We didn't know who was coming and I had no idea I'd get such a bouncing blonde boy! I remember so vividly the moment his head came out, I remember how hard it was to push, I remember Chris holding my hand, my brother yelping and my mom crying. I remember looking at him as they carried him to the warming table and immediately yet slowly realizing that he was a real boy, a real individualized person to join our family. He wasn't me, he wasn't Chris, he was Oliver! Chris and I knew right away what to name him and ever since people tell me, "you know, he looks like an Oliver!" After all the chatter and guests, Chris laid Ollie in my weak arms and went to find food for himself. I immediately started crying as I naturally told Oliver who I was and how I'd always care for him to the best of my abilities. Ahh, motherhood!

I truly delight in my son. He is a constant reminder that life should and CAN be joyous. He laughs all the time. When he is hurt he relishes in being comforted. He forgives easily and looks forward to each experience, small moment and story. He is happy to share himself with the people around. He expresses himself, makes himself known. He is proud of his accomplishments and he loves himself. He likes to comfort me when I'm sad and is very empathetic when his baby cousins cry.

Ollie is still one of the cutest kids I've ever seen. He has fine floppy blond hair that grows in a perfect swirl out of the middle of his head. His huge eyes are as blue as the Caribbean ocean and he has round apple cheeks. His front two teeth are rounded and have space between them and when they show in a smile it makes me giggle. He is strong and big, though I can see he has slimmed down from Age 1 to 2.

As his birthday party was wrapping up I looked over and saw Ollie with his new bike helmet, one shoe on, one shoe off, a lollipop sticking out his mouth, a new toy in his hand and fully entranced watching his friend play near him. He's so grown, so pulled together! To think last year he wasn't walking yet, and now he hit a pinata and demanded a respectable fork for his cake!

I cried a few weeks ago as I realized (again) how fast this is going, and cried for the time that we'll never re-gain. His baby years are gone forever. But Chris pointed out to me that we have no regrets, which is all we can ask for in life. Somehow we raised a newborn into a toddler who is happy and healthy. We didn't use many books, just our own instincts and the wisdom of our trusted community, and we became parents. We are parents. I am Oliver's mommy and there is no greater moment in the world than when he runs down the hall to me with his arms stretched wide for a hug.